A Note about endings…
Jules Grenville, B&H Frontline Network
Within support services, endings happen regularly. This can happen on a micro and macro level. Some projects or services for example, are only funded short term, others might even end abruptly. Another common ending can be when a client moves on from a support service or a worker leaves their role which ‘ends’ that relationship. This can create a rupture, and feelings of loss or grief.
On 22nd May, a small group of staff from across MCN support services came together to take a moment and reflect on endings; in particular what they mean and how can we produce an ending that feels safe and trauma-informed.
Your personal relationships with endings
Endings are uniquely personal and can affect people in different ways. Take a moment to think about these questions (1):
What are some of the reasons why something might need to end?
In your experience, what do we fear about endings?
What can happen when we fail to end something in time?
What have you learned by ending something too early?
How do you know it’s the right time to end things?
How can you bring a positive perspective to endings, without resorting to toxic positivity?
Why are endings necessary?
How have endings created new opportunities in your career and life?
What do you to acknowledge, mark or celebrate an ending?
In the future, how will you support yourself when experiencing an ending?
How does your service do endings?
Is your ending in line with the five pillars of trauma-informed care (safety, trust, choice, collaboration, empowerment)
A few top tips on endings:
Talk about it. Don’t shy away from discussing endings or what uncomfortable feelings they produce.
Legacy and continuity - Is this part of a process that can carry on for that person or service?
Celebrating endings - Try to celebrate and highlight the good work that has happened
Not one size fits all - Endings will look and feel different depending on the context
Resources: